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Not much has happened in our lives lately. You would think that living in Malaysia, we would constantly be having jungle adventures and new experiences. This is not the case. We have fallen into a routine and the new and exciting is requiring more effort on our part. It is easy to become complacent when you work/ go to school most of the day. Both Trip and I leave the house about 8:15 every morning and we get home between 6 - 6:30 every night. The days are long and the evenings are over all too soon thanks to homework and housework.
Even though our lives sound pretty boring right now, we both enjoy the fact that we work together. We also have been loving the presence of Jack and Tigger. Mr. B hit the nail on the head when he said the pets would force Trip to relax. Jack and Trip have a little walking routine now and Tigger just loves sitting out on the balcony and watching the birds. We were a little worried that she might try something stupid like walking on the ledge (we live on the 9th floor) but she has been really good. Despite the long hours of studying he is putting in, Trip is loving school. He gets all excited about what he is working on and loves talking to me about it, even though I get lost pretty quick. It is nice to see him doing something he is so passionate about.
I am being kept on my toes between my church responsibilities, work, and keeping our apartment clean and everyone fed. By the time 10:30pm rolls around, I can usually be found passed out in our bedroom. While it is good that I have so much to keep me busy, I am looking forward with anticipation to the Chinese New Year holiday. Hopefully, we will have pictures and more ethnic stories after that.
Lately it seems as though I have been learning that the advice we are often given in regards to relationships holds true in more ways than I originally thought. I am sure many of us have heard that "you can't make someone change" or "he/ she won't change just because you want them to" or something very similar. I believe this statement and have tried to apply this 'rule' to my relationships with family and friends. For awhile I had thought that people merely needed to desire a change in order for it to happen. I have since realized that in order for someone to make changes in their behavior, they must also be the one to decide to change. Well, I have now found that this relationship rule has another layer of complexity.
Recently, I was able to observe someone who decided they wanted to change something at work. They asked for advice on how to make this change possible. The 'adviser' took their job seriously and spent hours of time that they did not have, sacrificing sleep, study time, and personal time to go above and beyond and do this person a 'favor'. However, when the time came to give recommendations and share their advice, the 'advisee' turned out to be immovable and borderline hostile, as if the very idea of change was ludicrous. (Not an exaggeration...I was present for this unfortunate event.) Why would they react this way?! I was utterly baffled. I knew how sincerely the person had been about instituting change and yet they were so resistant when asked to commit to it. I was caught completely off guard by this reaction. If you desire to change and you have decided to change, why not make the change?
It was in pondering this question that I came to a realization. I too have set goals to change and yet in some instances I have resisted change very adamantly. It certainly seems irrational and doesn't make sense now, but at the time it must have made sense to me. And herein lies the lesson that I was being taught: Desiring and deciding to change are not the only steps that must be taken in order for change to be successful. I have desired many things and decided that I would have them, yet I still have not followed through on my decisions. No, making the decision is just an intermediate step between desiring change and committing to the process of change. Without being committed to our decision to change we will ultimately talk ourselves out of it when it gets difficult, which it inevitably will.
We cannot force change upon others because they must be the ones to commit to the long and painful process that is 'change'. If we are not committed we will not push through the resistance and barriers that stand in our way. In these cases, the 'easy' path becomes the more enticing option and we abandon any change that can lead to self-improvement, telling ourselves it is "too hard" or "not worth the effort" so that we feel happy about justifying our failures. This may sound dramatic and you may tell yourself you don't do this, but the reality is that we all do it to some extent or another.
Change at any level is only possible when we commit ourselves to the outcome...when we talk ourselves in to change instead of out of it. True, this is easier said than done. Change is still hard. But I would much rather feel the pain of change to improve myself and be happier than to stay the same and become blind to these opportunities.
Jack and Tigger officially arrived at our apartment yesterday afternoon. It was quite the experience just trying to get them here and we couldn't have done it without help from family...that was crucial! So, thank you to all those who made it possible for our little family to be reunited.
Both Jack and Tigger survived the long airplane ride pretty well, and they were so excited and happy to see us waiting for them in the airport. It was hard to have to leave them again when they were taken into quarantine. Luckily, we were able to visit them everyday while they were there, which made it easier for them and for us. The first day of quarantine I think they were convinced they were getting abandoned there because they were so desperate for us to stay. But by the last day, they knew that we were coming back and while they weren't thrilled about being left there, they were no longer desperate.
I went to pick them up yesterday morning since Trip had classes and my boss had given me the 'okay' to miss some work. (I would have missed it anyway, just figured I would let them know.) When I finished going through the paperwork I was informed that the cost was about twice as much as I had anticipated and therefore I did not have enough cash on hand...gasp! I was so frustrated, and of course they don't take credit cards, so I had to drive another 30 mins back to the school to get money from Trip to go back to the airport to free our pets...I love cash based societies...
Anyway, both Trip and I are so happy to have them here and they seem to have transitioned pretty well. Tennyson (the boy who will be coming over to let Jack out and play with him while we are at work during the week) came over today to meet the Captain and Tigs, and of course was won over immediately. We have such great pets!
Well, that is the most exciting thing that has happened this week. We will post more later!
My first post in 2010. It is so crazy that another year has come and gone. It's really weird to think that we are already in 2010...time is moving too fast and it's making me feel old. Our Christmas was a lot of fun and we had a good time on New Year's eve. We spent most of the day with the Renner family and went to a talent show where Anne and I sang with some ladies in the branch. Then we all went and got food and rang in the new year together. We went over the next day to play games too. It was fun, but I couldn't help thinking that Angie and Preston's presence would have made the games even better!
Now, we are back at work and real life. Work isn't horrible, but it's not what I would choose to do with my time if I had the choice. We get to see Jack and Tigger soon! They get here on Wednesday, and will be in quarantine for a week, but we can visit anytime so that is exciting. I can't believe how long it has been since we saw them last...we have missed them a ton!
